Never Would I Ever
by theJilyandLamesFanatic
Summary: James never thought something as horrible as this would ever happen. This can't be happening, can it? Please R&R :


**Never Would I Ever**

A/N:Written for the second round of Penelope Fiction's "It's a Competition... Don't Ditch It!" Challenge.

**Disclaimer: JKR owns all.**

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In all my seven years here, I never thought this day would come. And yet, today is the day. Time has made a fool of me once more. I'm lying on my back on the soft, green grass under the old Beech tree by the Lake. The shade provided by our favourite tree allows for the perfect amount of heat to sift through the branches. I call it our tree because we've been lazing about or plotting pranks beneath its ancient boughs for seven years. The fluffy clouds swim lazily across the sky, being pushed along by a light, summery breeze. Today is considered to be one of great celebration, as we have had precious little to celebrate for many years. This day, and the months leading up to it turned my stomach inside out and upside down. The anticipation alone forms a new knot every day; I swear the knots in my stomach have knots of their own. I always thought that it would take half a century to get to seventh year, to don my cap and gown, to leave. It seems that I may have blinked one too many times; I'll be boarding my last Hogwarts Express ever in a few hours time.

"Prongsie?"

I rolled onto my front, sliding my glasses into their proper position, "Yes, Padfoot?"

"I was thinking..." Sirius said slowly as he levitated a rock and hurtled it into the lake with a _plunk._ There was a great snorting noise coming from my right, it sounded like the Giant Squid was yelling at Sirius from under the glossy surface of the lake.

Remus, still half-laughing, half-spluttering on his pumpkin juice laid his book down to protect it. "Now we're in for it... And we thought Voldemort was dangerous!"

Peter squealed, "Don't say the name!" He clapped both hands over his ears, wincing.

"Never mind then," Sirius huffed. "I _won't_ tell you what I know, then."

"It would take all of ten minutes, mind you." Remus chuckled behind his book, shielding himself from Sirius' glare.

"C'mon now, we're all friends here. What is it, Padfoot?"

Sirius sat up straight, dusting the grass off his front importantly. "No, no. You've all had a chance to find out. I'm far too insulted to share now."

Remus put his book down for a second. "Prongs, I think I just happen to have found you an in with Evans..."

Her name made my stomach do a somersault, "Really? Do tell."

"I've just noticed that she's been moping about, maybe you can say something that isn't stupid to cheer her up."

"Well spotted, mate. It must be because our time left here at Hogwarts is dwindling." I picked at the grass by my feet. "I'm running out of time, too." I mumbled this to myself, rather than to anyone else. They know I'm running out of time, Remus hasn't tried to help me with Lily since sixth year when we turned her hair an alarming shade of fuchsia. Sirius may or may not have misinterpreted what he'd intended me to do, and well, the rest is history. Plans usually don't turn out quite the same way when Sirius is added to the equation.

Sirius shifted uncomfortably, staring at his feet. "Seven years, gone."

"Hard to believe, isn't it?" Peter asked while casting stones across the glassy surface of the lake. "You'd better make your move on her before it is too late, Prongs."

I swallowed a lump in my throat, "Before the End of Term feast, I s'pose." Time took delight in slowing right down before we wrote our NEWTs, but now, every second passes like an hour. I had an odd feeling that time can sense my nervousness.

"Well I'm off, gents." Sirius rose to his feet, checking his bottom for grass.

"You can't be heading to the Kitchens before the Feast?" Remus stared at him incredulously.

"_Tut. Tut. Tut. _Moony, have I taught you nothing? Going to the Kitchens before a Feast is like flying around the Pitch before a match, it's a warm-up."

I couldn't even _think_ about eating until I spoke to Lily. What if she said no? The last time I ever see her again will be tonight, after we cross the magical barrier between Platforms nine and ten. The very thought of never seeing her again made my heart flutter, and not in a death-defying-Quidditch-dive, thrilling kind of way. The feeling was more like finding-a-Dark-Mark-lingering-over-your-home, heart-stopping kind of way.

The sense of overwhelming impending doom that enveloped me on my way to find Lily was practically paralyzing. I've never been this afraid of rejection in my entire life. She isn't going to say no, it will be fine. She isn't going to say no, she won't call you an arrogant toerag. I may be lying to myself, but it helps me convince my legs to carry me up to the castle.

Against my better judgement, I decided to take a short cut to the Gryffindor common room. James, why do you want to face this sooner, rather than later? In the corridor, just after the portrait blocking the entrance to the Kitchens I heard something that made my heart skip a beat. I heard someone giggle, I heard Lily giggle. No, you're just being paranoid. I tried to convince myself that it wasn't Lily that I'd heard. No sooner had the thought left my mind, two people stumbled out of a deserted classroom all tangled up in each other. Sirius Black was snogging the love of my life.

I stood there and stared, in complete and utter shock. My heart plummeted; there was no way she would say yes now. She's seeing someone else, she _loves _someone else. Sirius must have noticed someone standing there, "This isn't a free show you know... Oh, Prongs. I know this looks bad, but---"

_Whack!_ I punched him straight on the nose.

"James... James?" I could hear Lily's voice, she sounded far away. I blinked and her face came into focus. "Bad dream?"

I nodded, "A nightmare, really. You and Sirius were snogging on Graduation Day." I opened and clenched my hand; apparently I'd punched the headboard.

Lily laughed, "Never would I ever." She kissed my bruised hand and placed it on her round middle. "I wouldn't dream of having this baby with anyone else. I'm sorry, but you're stuck with me now. Don't run off snogging other girls in my dreams."

I laughed, beaming at my beautiful wife. Even in the darkest and most dangerous times, we still manage to find something to laugh about. "Never would I ever."


End file.
